December 26, 2010

Sorry it has been so long since I blogged, I think I had a blogging block...well, this has been our second Christmas without Danielle and I can say it never gets any easier. I recently was afforded the opportunity to see Danielle's killer come to justice. He had requested a plea deal and the state offered him Life + 10 years after they discussed it with our family and then he decided to take it on December 17th and appeared before the sentencing Judge in his case on Monday, December 20th almost a year to the date that he confessed to her murder stating it was an accident. It appeared to us as the best option because we were insured he would serve 30 years without parole and then 10 years plus any time it would take for application of parole. It also prevented him from ever being able to appeal his case. We decided to keep this decision between close family and friends only due to the fact that he could have changed his mind before he went before the judge.

As I have been blogging and preaching on forgiveness over the past year, I really knew I had forgiven him as he walked into the room for sentencing and looked to see his family and noticed there was no one there for him at all. Not one sole and not one had been to any of his hearings since the original bond hearing that all of the evidence was presented to the judge and his mother saw what he had done to my child. I can say that I felt nothing towards him...no anger, not mercy, not feelings at all other than pity or maybe even a little sorry for him. He didn't know it but I was there to make sure my child had justice for her death, but the only person that will have to answer to God when he dies is him. He will have to answer for what he did to an innocent life. He not only took her life but his as well and now where were all the so called friends that defended him on facebook...no where. They all realized he had indeed had killed someone and they have now turned from him. I only hope that he finds his own forgiveness in prison and that he uses God's word in prison to make a difference in someone else's life.

A lot of people don't understand that I have no hatred for him, but I don't. I find that through God's strength that He has blessed me with during this difficult time has been front and center the entire time. When you forgive someone totally, you will know it. Because when you do, when you see them you will feel no anger towards the person that wronged you. I was able to witness this first hand in his sentencing hearing. Ultimately, God will seek revenge for Danielle and all of us that loved her, it is not for us to do, it is His position only to pass judgment, not us.

We loved Danielle and will love her forever. I wanted everyone to know from my perspective how this could turn out to be such a calm and easy walk for me. I give all the Glory to God! I am reminded constantly that the bible says an eye for an eye but that was the old testament, after Jesus died for our sins, it is not only the righteous that are saved it is everyone that asks...and that would include him if he asks God for forgiveness, he should be forgiven as well.

Love to all of you and I hope to be able to blog more often. Thank you so much for following.